I got my first parking ticket today, and I really don't care. They're only charging me for $35 and I should be grateful that no points are being taken off of my license or any bullshit like that. I learned my lesson not to park where everyone else is in an innocent-looking place. Christina will not park in the wrong place again. It's no big deal. I wish everyone would say that about everything because it would make my life a lot easier. My dad's eyes practically fucking sprung out of his head (I hate that analogy but that's what he looked like, I swear) when I told him, and freaking out doesn't either help or ease the situation, so why the fuck freak out in the first place? Sheesh louise.
For some reason I had a blast today driving to and from college. It's usually the music that makes me act weird. I put on Velvet Revolver and wanted to laugh the whole time because Scott Weiland is just a funny man. Poor guy is bi-polar and probably throws a hissyfit or eight a day because so many people keep going up to him to tell him that he looks exactly like Clint Eastwood. That shit just cracks me up.
And Aerosmith? Aerosmith makes the greatest driving music. Period. Try it, man.
Christina N. @ 5:46 PM
Tuesday, September 25
WTF
Today, Clint was on TV and I reminded her of Scott again. She mentioned how Clint has some sort of a Cindy Crawford mole on his upper lip and that Scott didn't. I corrected her and told her that he just covers his mole with makeup. That just proves even more that Clint Eastwood and Scott Weiland are the same fucking person; Clint duplicated himself exactly 40 years ago and created an asexual son of whom he named "Scott Richard Kline," a crazy (bi-polar) boy who would eventually and stubbornly change his name to "Scott 'The Man With No Veins' Weiland."
Bonus!
And now, I would like to articulate on how much I fucking love Clint Eastwood. There is no need to speculate on how fantastic shit like Dirty Harry and The Man With No Name are. All I need is to reference Denis Leary on the Jimmy Kimmel Show a couple weeks ago, telling Jimmy that he had to leave the interview early because there was going to be a Clint Eastwood special on PBS soon and he had to rush home to see it - and he doesn't have TiVo to record it, I think. Jimmy felt insulted by that, so Denis proceeded to show how far above the scale that Clint is over Jimmy by indicating levels with his hands. And thus, the interview ended.
Christina N. @ 11:24 PM
Monday, September 24
My parents went out today and bought me a $400 GPS navigation system for my car. WTF? I couldn't believe it. You know what my mom's reason was? "So that when you are lost in Newark, you won't have to pull over and ask somebody for directions. You can't trust people in Newark." True (All of that was said in a broken english, vietnamese asian accent). But I never knew that they would go to such lengths and actually buy one of those electronic pixelated talking coloring maps. My pops and I were playing with it today, and I have to say, it's pretty badass. They got me a TomTom ONE XL (like anybody knows what the fuck that is in the first place. And you gotta love the name). Knowing me who has trouble finding bathrooms all the time, I would probably end up at some point holding it in my hands on the street playing Marco Polo. That is, if some punkass bitch doesn't punch me in the face and runs away with my GPS.
I am never used to owning such luxuries that speak to me. It really does speak to me - it tells me where to go so I am less lonely in my car. I think, of all things - that it would eventually become my best friend because actual humans don't like talking to me very much. This inclines me to give my GPS a name. What shall it be?
I also got a $25 gift card from Wachovia today in the mail. So what do? Go on the Urban Outfitters website, bitch! This gorgeous piece of fabric only cost a miraculous $24.99.
Fuck yes!
Christina N. @ 10:21 PM
Wednesday, September 19
Every day I am saddened by the fact that I simply cannot afford to shop at Anthropologie as much as I would like to. I just can't, man. It is a heart-wrenching truth that nobody wants to face. A little piece of me dies every day that they have new shipment to their stores.
They don't even have rare coupons. No credit card. Nothing. If they had a credit card that came with promotions and shit like that, I would jump on it almost as fast as I would jump on Mike Patton. No joke. If I could, I would spend a good portion of my money on that goddamn store. But I don't have a good portion of money to begin with.
I tend to have a spending habit - dominantly on stupid things, which mainly consists of food. What can I say? I am a fucking food addict. Oh, you say you're a crack addict? I'm sorry but I don't like being addicted to a part of an ass. In college, especially in a city location, you walk around a lot. Such is the case with me, and I do extra foot work because I am an Olympic speed walker. The more you walk, the more calories you burn. The more energy you use, the more hungry you are. Do the math. Unfortunately that is the only type of math that I could do well.
Did I ever tell you how full of shit a lot of the Rutgers students are? I find it quite difficult to make friends. For example (true story) - when I make conversation with a stranger during an entire class period and we're getting to know each other pretty well and nothing seems to go wrong, when class is over they just walk straight out the door without even saying goodbye or inviting me to get something to eat or anything. I really don't understand that. Oh, I suck? I know I suck but I don't think that's the case. I talk and engage in people the same way at work - and everybody is almost like family (one other than mine) there. Newark is lame. End of story.
This lack of companionship leaves me to extreme levels of boredom and free time during my breaks - times of which I do not have my car because my mom takes it to work. I am sad to say that I had developed a smoking habit, for simply running out of things to do. Wait, you know what? I'm not fucking sad at all because cigarettes taste good. Lung cancer? Throat cancer? Funky smell? Nasty coughs? Early death? I could do without those adult diaper-wearing, bedpan pissing, hip breaking days, okay? I really do despise anti-smoke bitches. As long as smokers don't blow smoke in everybody's faces or leave cigarette butts everywhere and are aware of the health issues, then they're alright - it's their choice; mind your own business. I had it coming for me anyway, considering that for my entire high school career random kids would always walk up to me and ask for a cigarette.
New Jersey, along with its population of high school students in general is lame. And it's "going east to the beach," not "going down the shore." Fucking idiots don't know jack shit about anything. Have you noticed that only people from New Jersey think that New Jersey is awesome? You should know exactly what I mean - there's people from New York who love Massachusetts and California, but New Yorkers hate New Jersey. Do Californians or Virginians like New Jersey? No. Do Floridians like New Jersey? No. Do Idahoans like New Jersey? No. Not even people from an irrelevant state such as Idaho (no, U da ho!) have kind feelings toward New Jersey. Get a fucking clue. Move someplace else. No wait, actually don't - we don't want New Jerseyans infecting the good soil of other pure American lands (America isn't really pure to begin with in the first place). Nobody else likes New Jersey, because it's fucking dumb. Only New Jerseyans take pride in other New Jerseyans because nobody else fucking likes them. Face it, New Jersey sucks. We have nothing to be proud about. We may have beaches, cities, shopping plazas, Starbucks, and whatnot; but other states have all of those things - but better. New Jerseyans are just jealous that their shit sucks and therefore turn everything around to make it sound as if it's great. It's all fake. New Jersey is full of nothing.
Why are New Yorkers so depressed?
Because at the end of the tunnel is New Jersey.
Christina N. @ 7:54 PM
Monday, September 17
Have you ever had one of those times where you have to shit really badly while at someplace other than home, and go out of your way to find a public restroom that is deserted from the crowds? Well, this morning after my first class and having eaten a bunch of fiber (the Starbucks "Very Veggie Wrap" and a "toffee almond bar"), I soon found myself pregnant with a brick inside my abdomen. I walked into an obscurely located empty restroom in the building, and sat in an obscurely located stall. I thought I was going to be in for a 5-minute shrinkfest for my tummy, until only seconds later before I reached euphoria I hear a girl walk into the restroom and sit her stupid ass in the stall right next to mine. What baffles me is that while I was walking the halls looking for a sacred portal, I could have fucking sworn that I was by myself; the entire building seemed deserted and my footsteps echoed. And then lo and behold, Satan sends one of his bitches after me from out of nowhere. And not to mention that that bathroom had at least ten stalls in it. Isn't it fucking common courtesy when there are few people in a public area, they stay away from each other as much as possible? It's like when you're in an empty movie theater by yourself, and all of a sudden comes this stranger with a bucket of popcorn the size of a dog bath who for some stupid fuckass reason decides to sit their fat fucking ass right next to you - and therefore ruin the entire movie-watching experience. Well, this girl didn't just have to take a pee. She was also calling somebody in the stall. Dude, you are at least fucking 18 years old and in college - cell phones are not Nazi confiscated like they were in middle school or high school. There's no need to be hiding in a bathroom stall (albeit in an empty bathroom whose occupant right next to you is in the empty bathroom for a legitimate reason) to make a goddamn phone call. It's called "going outside because the building exit is only around the corner from the bathroom."
I even tried waiting it out for the bitch to leave. She just wouldn't. So I got fed up and hiked across campus to the library.
Christina N. @ 10:08 PM
Tuesday, September 11
Forgive me, yesterday's list was done after only getting a smidge of sleep and almost causing quite a few car accidents because of it. Therefore, the list should have been much longer.
11. Ellen Degeneres
Come on, seriously. This butch ain't funny. She is a prime example of American stupidity. I once tried watching her show, and right afterwards I performed a Footloose dance montage in such frustration. Well I didn't really do that, because it wouldn't do anything to ease the situation. When I hate something I would just like to incapacitate it. But unfortunately if I were to be the one to give it to Ellen, 20 million housewives, 10 million horny men, and 1 billion butch lesbians would make sure that my ass is fried. Oh, and her MasterCard commercials reveal the ugly side of capitalism so well. Why didn't she end up working with animals? She would be a nobody and I would be a very happy girl.
12. Ashley Tisdale
This bitch can't act or sing or do anything worth a shit. Give me her job and and I will win a Nobel Prize. You know what? As a matter of fact, why won't I just put the entire Disney Channel up-and-coming media tools on this list?
13. Disney Channel Up-and-Comers
Raven Simone. Brenda Song. Ashley Tisdale. Zac Efron. Corbin Bleu. Dylan and Cole Sprouse. Bitter wastes of life - out there to rip off us Americans' good-earned money on their terrible Disney DVDs, lunchboxes, backpacks, and tampons. The state of Disney as of late has Walt doing roundhouse kicks in his grave.
14. Russell Crowe
This one is kind of iffy, considering that he is somewhat respected throughout the movie business. But you know what I think? I think he sucks. Russell Crowe is like a slightly classier Steven Seagal - and everything and everybody even remotely compared to Steven Seagal needs to go. Crowe can't act; he has only one emotion - and that emotion is "having no emotion." One voice, one tone, one facial expression - ONE MINUTE LEFT TO LIVE.
15. Larry King
His career started from respected news anchor who seemed somewhat intelligent and credible. Now his career has downsized to interviewing every supposedly valued bumblefuck out there. And plus, stop boning all these young meat chicks. That's just gross. Is that really the Elixir of Life, and that's what's keeping him alive? I hope his wife gets angry at him soon and drains him of his youth juice.
16. J.K. Rowling
This Harry Potter franchise needs to end. It is nothing but a marketing scam (but then again, what isn't a marketing scam nowadays?). Her fictional little virgin boy is getting way too much praise than he deserves. He and his two conniving bitch friends are nothing but nosy, egotistic shitfucks who think they can do anything that they want without getting punished for it. Seriously, Harry. If you didn't poke your nose into such uncharted ground, all of the shit that you went through in the series wouldn't have happened. I say, you should have killed your aunt and uncle the first time they made you sleep in a goddamn closet. Any smart kid would have done that. He would have been tried as a child and gone to juvy for about 15 years - and this would all be before he even found out that he was "magical."
17. Aaron Spelling
No wait, he died last year. And that's a good thing, because he spewed out more television trash than me shitting nukes after eating clams. And not to mention that he fathered perhaps the ugliest person on Earth next to Ron Perlman - Tori Spelling. That bitch needs to take tips from Face/Off.
I don't know why the last three targets' last names end with "ing." Take note of this, children - if your last name ends with "ing," BEWARE.
Christina N. @ 9:36 PM
Monday, September 10
Here is a list of people that need to die. With reasons given, of course!
1. Zac Efron
He is scheduled to star in the 2008/2009 re-make of the 1980s cult classic "dance-arific" film, Footloose. Footloose happens to be one of my most favorite, if not already, movie of all time. It was perfect in every way all to, and in, itself. Nobody, including people who hate this film, needs the Disney Channel's leftovers being mixed with easy listening '80s tunes. Don't do it; for the sake of human life itself. All we need to do is sacrifice one person. Just one. And maybe the director.
2. Britney Spears
Very typical answer. But, she is at an extreme low point in her life. And if she were to die right now, she wouldn't have had time to make a comeback - therefore she would not be remembered as an "Eternal Sleeping Beauty" or some other lame-ass bullshit like, "Deceased Pop Princess."
3. Burt Reynolds
Your career is over. Be done.
4. Steven Seagal
Nobody knows if he's even still alive anyway.
5. Danny Bonaduce
This man causes for a worldwide pukefest every time he comes on TV without a shirt on. His career was over thirty years ago. The VH1 show didn't do him any justice. No career, no good looks, no purpose, NO LIFE!
6. Star Jones
To stop her feeble attempts at taking over the world with her fish face. As if the earth didn't already have a bad enough reputation. Those microscopic organisms on Mars are doing shots for every time she signs another one of her books. /end corny joke
7. Jean-Claude Van Damme
Your time here has expired.
8. Fidel Castro
If America wants to kill a Cuban dictatorial leader so badly, they like to do it dramatically. That isn't going to happen with an old man wearing Depends that are made out of opium leaves infused with baby oil. They want to drop a nuke the size of John Goodman on a young, maniacal leader who can actually go to the bathroom by himself - Raul Castro. And that's not saying much.
9. Kanye West
He's just a fucking pain in the ass that never shuts up.
10. Barbara Walters
You suck. You have gotten too much facial reconstruction. You are senile old bitch. I don't care how many politicians you have fucked. You've been going through menopause for a really long goddamn time, considering you still qualify to remain on The View.
And there, my friends - are the ten people on this planet who have biblical targets engraved into their souls. They are damned for all eternity. The only way that they will be pardoned is to stop what they are doing and free us good Earthlings from bad taste..
Christina N. @ 10:24 PM
Sunday, September 9
Today was a long fucking day. I mean like Peter Steele long. So I wake up at 7:40 to get ready for work at 9:00. It was one hell of an agonizing meeting to 11:00, man. Like I mentioned yesterday, there's new benefits regarding the store credit card and the company gave our store teaching products. I swear, I felt like I was back in fucking high school. So my natural reaction was to unknowingly rest my head on my arms on the table and stretch and yawn like a gorilla. That, my friends - is one of the reasons how high school fucked with me. They fucked up my manners with their horrible ways.
After the meeting, I would be working straight until 7:00PM. Damn.
On a lighter note - during my hour break, I went baby shopping for my friend's baby shower on Saturday. And I have to tell you, I had the greatest goddamn time picking out stuff for that baby. Can't mention where I got the gift from due to lingering eyes, but it's from an upscale store where they wrapped it in the most adorable light green/white polka-dotted, scallop-trimmed tissue paper (HARDXCORE), checkered green box with blue paisley lid, and light green ribbon. I felt kind of old going out and buying that type of stuff for the first time in my life, but I loved picking out cute little baby things with bows and pastel colors and shit - basically this is a step up from dressing stupid fucking dolls, and myself. It's a rare occasion where I am actually invited to such shindigs and therefore get to go shopping that isn't for greedy reasons (me). And my philosophy on buying things for others is - If you really cared for the person whom you're getting a gift for, don't they deserve something nice? If not, then you obviously don't give a flying fuck about them and need to go lick a mole turd. I seriously hate buying cheap shit for people - it just doesn't feel right. I mean, you're inclined or obligated to get someone something - so why not get them something that actually matters? Instead of wasting your goddamn money. I don't know man, but that's my take on philanthropy. Too bad I don't have that many friends, because you're missing out on a lot of love.
LOLZ
Christina N. @ 10:37 PM
Saturday, September 8
There was a bomb threat at Rutgers-Newark today. I had absolutely no idea at all, whatsoever, that it was even going on or happened at all! As a matter of fact, I didn't find out until I got home and checked my e-mail. I have to get out of there, I really do. Kind of weird though - I don't know what to think of it; because the campus itself actually isn't that bad. No noisy crowds/groups, people are nice, area is clean, security is abundant, the area is peaceful - I kind of liked it. But no matter what, I'd still prefer New Brunswick. Now I really prefer New Brunswick after this bomb threat shit. Fuck that, seriously. If this sort of thing happened in high school, it wouldn't really matter much because high school students are nothing but dipshitted assholes who think that they can have a good time by doing stupid things. But in college - in Newark, well, it's a whole 'nother story.
On a lighter note, a friend of mine who is a senior in New Brunswick invited me to attend the English Department party (L0LZ) on Wednesday. Free wine is reportedly going to be flowing about, and it's a good opportunity for me to get a heads up on how to transfer there and whatnot. Especially since I have decided to major in writing. If Lady Luck is on my side, ol' Mum will allow me to stay overnight at my friend's dorm. It shall be cool beans.
It's a shame that the new Kevin Bacon movie isn't doing so golly-gee swell in the box office. It just breaks my heart. Death Sentence is quite the quality film. I highly recommend it. You stupid fuckers wanting to see Halloween when you've seen it already in 1978? Have some fucking logic, come on. I liked The Poseidon Adventure - didn't need to see it again with Patrick "I'm Ugly" Swayze. Seriously, the Halloween franchise fucking sucks. Michael Myers can't walk worth a shit. He walks slower than a fucking paraplegic in a motorized wheelchair. Same thing with Jason - and shitfucks still can't run from them? You've got to be fucking kidding me. Michael gets his head chopped off in one sequel, only to come back in the next. That shit is fucking stupid - there isn't even any supernatural background to these motherfuckers and all of a sudden they have plaster and hockey masks glued to their faces and Hulk Hogan muscles, when clearly their life solely consists of walking with knives, trying to poke a hole in little teenagers. Jean-Claude Van Damme movies make more sense than that.
How could Balls of Fury be doing better than Death Sentence? Where are you, God? Oh yeah, you don't exist. That's why Balls of Fury is racking in close to $10 million more than Death Sentence and Stardust. Even though I have no interest in Stardust, I could guarantee you that is much more qualified than un-funny ape turds than Balls of Fury is. Christopher Walken, why must you sink down to such a level?
I really don't understand why hordes of people flock to the movies to see such mindless bullshit that is over-hyped by other cretins who think that they are good films. Knocked Up is a good example of this. I saw it a long time ago but I still want what seems like three hours and ten dollars of my life back.
Christina N. @ 12:27 AM
Thursday, September 6
1)Three Names you go by:
a )Christina
b )Nguyen
c) the asian
Three Parts of Your Ethnic Heritage:
1) Vietnamese
2) Vietnamese
3) One chinese ancestor that got in there somehow. Whoever mated with them is a whore and ruined my purity.
Three Things That Scare You:
1) Groucho Marx
2) the possibility of a shitty Mike Patton album
3) chickpeas
Three Everyday Essentials:
1) saturated fatty foods
2) check out my sexy hair
3) coughing up loogies
Three Things You're Wearing Right Now:
1) Canada t-shirt (L0LZ)
2) green shorts
3) yellow skin
Three Favorite Bands at the Moment:
1) Faith No More
2) Mr. Bungle
3) Anthrax
Three Favorite Songs at the Moment:
1) "A Small Victory" - Faith No More
2) "The Air-Conditioned Nightmare" - Mr. Bungle
3) "Archie & Veronica" - Lovage (Mike Patton has covered every musical genre known to man, true story.)
Three Things You Want in a Relationship (apart from Real Love)
1) sillyness
2) nonconformity
3) An irish man or a polish man. Sorry, can't help it.
Two Truths and One Lie
1) I am an alcoholic.
2) I masturbate to Clint Eastwood westerns.
3) My mother's aunt set herself on fire because of her cheating husband.
Three Things That Most Appeal To You About the Opposite Sex:
1) eyes
2) personality
3) facial structure
Three Things You Want to do Right Now
1) get rich
2) be born in an earlier decade
3) eat nachos
Three Places You Want to Go On Vacation:
1) Italy
2) San Francisco
3) Japan
Three Things You Want to do Before You Die
1) do the mashed potato with Paul Newman
2) write a book about the ethics of nothingness
3) go cow-tipping
Three Things That Make You a Stereotypical Girl
1) I spend too much money
2) I rack up the phone bill
3) I scream when I see a bug
Christina N. @ 10:33 PM
Wednesday, September 5
So today before class my mom and I went to the bank to settle this problem of why my debit card has never arrived in the mail yet, when I started an account in early August. As the bank teller looked up my records, turns out that my card had supposedly arrived on August 20th and was activated by somebody. Fucking great, man. Some fucking asshole who can't even make an honest buck takes some poor asian girl's ATM card to try to buy free burritos or some shit. I'm asian, do you think I would have much money in the first place? Can whoever it is that stole my card fucking read? Asians are poor, motherfucker!
Well, then there's the number of asians who make a lot of money and do nothing with it except put it in the bank to rack up interest, and wear mismatched clothing and whatnot. But that's not me.
Great. At first my parents weren't letting me get any type of check card to begin with, and then some dipshit asslicker had to steal it once I did get it. The thing is, in this oh-so-wonderful town of Rockaway, there are about two or three other streets with the same exact name as mine - with the same exact house numbers and everything. So I always get mail from either a latino house or a russian house, judging by their names on the envelopes. They are very obscene and lengthy foreign names, without even an english first name; I always laugh at that shit. Being the good citizen that I am, I always send the wrongly-delivered letters back so that they would get to their designated human being. So what most likely happened to my ATM card was that it was mailed to the wrong house and the motherfucker kept it and activated it, thinking that they could get money from me. But idiot didn't know that my pin number is needed to withdraw money. Yeah, like they're smart. Stealing my shit turned out to be pointless anyway. Should've just sent it back. Fucking immigrants, thinking they could extort us tax-paying citizens' shit. Shame, shame, shame. If I were Ted Nugent ,that sucker would've been hunted down by a 5-foot-tall wolfhound and have a 30-pound cap popped in their ass.
Fucking wasting my time. It's the reason why I haven't been able to withdraw any money from my bank account because I only keep so much paper money on hand from my checks. Sounds lame, but I often ask for free food or change from my co-workers at Banana Republic (pretty ironic, because if you work at such a prestigious store, wouldn't you have a hefty sum of money?) because I don't have any type of ATM or credit card to buy my own.
So the bank lady voided the card that never got to me and made me a new one with a new number and everything that I would be able to pick up on Saturday as opposed to having it being mailed to my house and risk being stolen by a non-english speaking cretin. Advice: Wachovia sucks balls. The only way to activate any type of card is to call the number that is on it with your home phone only, so that the company could verify that it really is you calling and not some douchefuck on the street who happens to pick up your card. Somehow, the motherfucker who stole my card activated it anyway with some other phone number that obviously isn't under my name, so it went through.
Classes today were lamesauce. English Composition, and Elements of Algebra. I suck at math so much that I'm not even on the level of College Algebra yet and probably have to take it in the future to fulfill my mathematics requirement. Yes, contrary to asian stereotypes, I have a very difficult time counting my own money and especially money on the register at work, and suck at math harder than dirt-poor whores sucking Castro's dick for some Kraft Mac & Cheese. Classes were goddamn boring and all I did during class was try to suppress my dying hunger and try to get my growing bangs in front of my face so that the professor couldn't see me sleeping.
Christina N. @ 8:39 PM
Tuesday, September 4
First day of college wasn't that bad. Russian was at 10:00 in the morning and we were dismissed only about 35 minutes later. It was quite a blessing, for I was very hungry already (what a surprise). The teacher was a sweet lady and didn't bore me as badly as my America & the World teacher. I'll get to that loser class later.
After Russian, I walked around campus looking for a place to get food. Being the social mole rat that I am, I stayed away from on-campus dining areas and searched outside for an independent eatery. There was this little asian (ha. ha.) cafe across the street with a cute little paper lantern in the front. I didn't even consider the shady-looking chinese restaurant next-door to it that was called "Lucky Good Fortune Restaurant" or some dirty generic shit like that.
Turns out that the only asian things in the asian cafe were the girl who works there and bubble drinks. What are bubble drinks? These are bubble drinks; also referred to as bubble tea, pearl drinks, boba tea, or just simply, boba:
It is generally, a fruit slushie (most preferably strawberry, mango, coconut, taro, etc. You know, weird fruits that prove that watermelon and apples aren't the only types of produce in the world) with soft and chewy tapioca pearls on the bottom. You drink it through a big straw. However, I have never seen boba drinks with fruit chunks placed on top like in the above photograph. I just chose it because it was pretty.
So yeah, I bought a coconut bubble drink without the bubbles because the cafe had run out, a poppyseed bagel with cream cheese and an M&M cookie. None of which were really good, but the girl working there was nice and the cafe was cute so I didn't really care. It's just that I'm probably not going to come back there for a long time.
I still had about two hours before my next class. Goddamn was I bored - especially without my car. Because, my parents both agreed that for the first month of college, my mom would have to sit passenger seat to and from school as I drove so that I would get familiar with Newark without getting myself into bad doody. Being without a car is not that bad; all I have to do is try to figure out the bus/transit schedule so that I could take trips to New York and actually have fun. Seriously, I spent a goddamn long time walking around the area of which surrounds University Heights, and there seriously is nothing to do.
All I found was a small gift shop of which smelled like funky incense that sold primarily Bob Marley memorabilia. How original. Can Rutgers-Newark and Newark itself be anymore lame? All there is in that fucking city are shady-looking eateries, homicidal alleys, exhaust fumes, black people, a couple thousand signs for the lame-ass art museum (I've been in there before; it really is lame), shitty-looking pizzerias, and parking lots. I think it's also the largest city in New Jersey. Could they at least have a shopping district? I can't even find a shopping plaza or mall or complex or anything online either! Fuck you, man. Seriously.
America & the World was terrible. I didn't really know that it was more technically a political science course. And I hate politics. It's nothing but bitching and bitching around in circles, only to go nowhere except to get fucking blown up. Lame. People have been taught politics for centuries. Never helped. But it's one of my required courses, so I have to stick with it if I want to transfer to New Brunswick or another college with more ease in the future. But anyway, the entire class today consisted of 18-year-old bitches who don't know shit about shit and constantly raising their hands to make a 7-minute speech about their opinions on Iraq, Jesus, and Pakistan. Let's make this clear - nobody gives a fuck. All I want to do is learn about the actual history topic; not about your feeble opinions. I know that I am also 18 and probably don't know shit about shit, but at least I don't constantly open my mouth and make an ass out of myself. The teacher herself was also a tool. Fuck that class. But I guess I'll just have to suck it up and get on with life - and hopefully out of Newark.
I have finally figured out the easiest and quickest way to be a beautiful-looking person.
Be born a polish person. I fucking swear, man: every single polish person is gorgeous. Every single one of them. Every single polish person that I know is good-looking. Seriously, take a look at your acquaintances. Point out the ones that are of polish descent. Are they not sexy? What the fuck is wrong with Hitler, putting so many poles to shame in their own country? He was fucking jealous, that's what.
Oh, and by the way, Paul Newman is part jewish.
Christina N. @ 8:47 PM
Monday, September 3
Death Sentence was fucking amazing. Kevin Bacon kicked tons of ass. It was more on the "man movie" side, being quite an action flick, but the melodramatic moments were very well done and actually, the whole fucking thing was well done. I loved it so much, man. I probably love it more than I really should because I happen to be a huge Bacon-head. A lot of people make fun of me for it, but I've always made fun of Kevin Bacon anyway for his name and some of his shittier movies. But yeah, I am totally purchasing the DVD when it comes out. That is, if I still have any money left after buying both separately released Grindhouse films. Fucking lame.
But yeah, like any other dork, I had to critique:
Okay. I was looking forward to watching this movie because I happen to very much admire Kevin Bacon's acting skills and awesome name, and it's been quite a while since he's been in the spotlight. (I think the last time that I had seen him on TV was on Queer Eye for the Straight Guy) Undoubtedly knowing that Halloween would definitely take the #1 spot in the box office this weekend, I thought I'd spend my ten bucks to support Death Sentence.
To be honest, I thought this was a really good movie. It was very well-done and the acting was great - much to the surprise to those who would think it'd turn out to be some kind of corny Jason Statham or Steven Seagal action flick. The plot seems kind of typical, and yes, also by the same guy who wrote the novel by which Death Wish was written and therefore bares a resemblance, but Death Sentence was pretty damn good on its own. The dramatic parts by which family members get murdered really got me. I couldn't believe it the second time around that it happened. But nonetheless, the pace kept me captivated throughout the entire film and I was not bored at any point, whatsoever. One of my favorite scenes, by far was the chase scene that ended at the parking structure. It's up there with some of my favorite chase scenes of all time, with The French Connection (yes, it was that awesome). Death Sentence may be more on the "man movie" side, but all in all, the shooting scenes were great and Kevin Bacon kicked a lot of ass.
Today, on Labor Day of the year of 2007, I worked eight and a half hours. (irony, no?) I agreed to do the long shift, because I desperately need money (to buy more Paul Newman movies). My manager felt sorry for me, having found out that I hadn't a cent on me to buy lunch, so she decided to order Domino's for the entire staff that was working today. Pizza is junk food. Therefore that pizza was damn good. I ate four slices while on my break as I watched Tremors. It was some good times. That movie fucking cracks me up. Labyrinth was even funnier. If you hadn't already noticed, I took a very long break.
So I start my very first day of college tomorrow. Thank goodness it isn't at some ungodly hour in the morning, and starts at 10:00, with Russian (don't ask why). You know I conspire to do many peculiar things, and learning russian will help a lot. Actually I initially just wanted Italian but the stupid fuckass course was full. Hopefully after this one semester I could transfer over to the New Brunswick campus. It would reduce my risk of dying and I could be with my h0mi3z. I fucking hate Rutgers; I will never emphasize that enough.
Where the fuck is Mike Patton? He's been more dormant than Alec Baldwin after he realized that he fucking sucks.
Christina N. @ 10:15 PM
1. Name a movie that you have seen more than 10 times: Robin Hood: Men in Tights
2. Name a movie that you've seen multiple times in the theater: I am too asianly cheap to do that.
3. Name an actor that would make you more inclined to see a movie: Paul Newman. But sadly he has retired from the movie biz, so I shall say Kevin BACON (crispy sizzle).
4. Name an actor that would make you less likely to see a movie: Frankie Muniz, Jesus fucking Christ.
5. Name a movie that you can quote from: Pulp Fiction, or pretty much any movie that Quentin Tarantino contributed to. True Romance was silly.
6. Name a movie musical that you know all the lyrics to all the songs: I lose six eggs every time somebody mentions "musical."
7. Name a movie that you have been known to sing along with: Does this not pertain to musicals? Fuck you, man.
8. Name a movie that you would recommend everyone see: The Evil Dead, just for the tree-rape scene.
9. Name a movie that you own: Cool Hand Luke
10. Have you ever seen a movie in a drive-in? No, drive-in theaters die faster than liberal russians.
11. Ever made out in a movie? No one ever wants to take me to a movie. How sad.
12. Name a movie that you keep meaning to see but just haven't gotten around to it: Party Monster
13. Ever walked out of a movie? I'm asian, of course I wouldn't waste such good money like that. Unless Frankie Muniz suddenly pops up out of nowhere.
14. Name a movie that made you cry in the theater: Death Sentence made me sad, but I did not cry.
15. Popcorn? I love junk food. Therefore I praise popcorn.
16. How often do you go to the movies? Every few weeks, perhaps. I am very picky. And cheap.
17. What's the last movie you saw in the theater? Death Sentence
19. What's your favorite/preferred genre of movie? War? Drama? Crime Drama? Does it look like a bitch?
20. What's the first movie you remember seeing in the theater? Toy Story
21. What movie do you wish you had never seen? Lawnmower Man 2: Jobe's War
22. What is the weirdest movie you enjoyed? Natural Born Killers
23. What is the scariest movie you've seen? 21 Grams, because I saw Naomi Watts' freckly tits.
24. What is the funniest movie you've seen? Oh god...Airplane! perhaps.
25. Name a movie you really want to see: The Deer Hunter ('tis true - being the war movie buff that i am, I have not yet seen this film. Quite depressing, really)
Christina N. @ 1:58 AM
