Of all things that people have chosen not to include me due to extreme criticism and ridicule, my parents made me go to temple with them today. A buddhist temple, that is. I know we're weird but we wouldn't go jewish that quickly. Yes, buddhism is great in the aspect that you are not forced to give into such bullshit like confession booths, only to be a goddamn hypocrite and sin again afterwards; all you have to do is respect others and think positive. It's pretty much just a religion where you have peace of mind.
But I am still the most staunch motherfucking atheist that has ever crawled out of a vagina. The reason my parents bought me and my sister along today was to pray for my dad's family, all four of whom were lost after the war. They disappeared in terms of us not knowing what the in the fucking hell happened them - they were on their way to the U.S. via raft/boat/shackriddle across the Pacific and were never heard from again. Okay, now walking around an altar to the sound of a bell and putting your hands together ain't physically going to bring anybody back before your eyes, kapeesh? But the only thing I found worthy of showing my face there is that my mindset had to be wishful for my missing relatives.
Another thing that wasn't right was that I physically am not one that is able to sit on their knees. Asshole, have you ever experienced the worst goddamn pain in your life when 120+ pounds of human weight are set on top of your ankles? How the fuck do asians sit like that all the time in prayer? How the fuck do japanese people eat like that? Axl Rose, I know how you feel, asshole. You and your fucking weak ankles and shit. But anyway, I was concentrating more on subtle ways on how to make it that my ankles don't crack into pieces beneath me while in front of a lot of people. Dude, that pain sucked balls. I was in such agony that it took me a couple seconds to stand up. Fuck that shit, man. And I don't know how I could possibly be sitting the incorrect way because how could you not know how to sit on your fucking knees?
Christina N. @ 5:21 PM
Saturday, July 28
I had an awesome day today, believe it or not. Hung out with Amy F. and went to New York and whatnot. There was a goddamn line going all the way around the block just for the fucking Magnolia Bakery. Are people that fucking slow in picking out fucking pastries? Fucking America, man; we're going down the shitter.
But hanging out with Amy was such cool beans. You know what else is cool beans?
Belt buckles with flask and flask holder. It fucking cracks me up, man.
Christina N. @ 10:37 PM
Friday, July 27
I fucking hate driving. I really do. Or rather, I hate drivers. The other day I was going 10-15 miles over the speed limit on a back road, and this motherfucker still tailgated me. One of the only things that I am excited about getting my license on Tuesday is that since my parents won't be in the car with me, I'll get to flip off and yell at as many bitchass motherfuckers as I want to. And I'll tell the shitface hispanics who constantly gawk at me to get a fucking passport, too.
Yeah, so I didn't get my license yet as I said a very long ago because my mom was being a doo doo head. When I first asked her if I could schedule my road test before vacation to California, she said no because "I wasn't ready." So I signed up for the end of July. By the time she changed her mind and said that I could get my license before vacation, all of the available days at the DMV were booked up to the end of July. What the fuck? is all I have to say.
So earlier this week Kerry and I, in attempts of filling our empty pockets, tried panhandling. She brought her guitar and we set up by the doors at the mall while I held up a sign that read, "NEED MONEY FOR COLLEGE." Yes, we were a complete fraud; because all we wanted was pocket money for food and whatnot. But we made $16.25 in just 45 minutes of panhandling before a janitor squealed on us and a security guard kicked us out. Can I emphasize that this is the hundredth time that a dipshit has ratted out on me for something completely not serious?
Vacation wasn't bad. I had so much shit to mention here but I never knew where to start, up until now where I can't even remember anything. I could write a huge picture entry, but that would take a goddamn long time. However, I could tell ya'll about the night that made my entire vacation, which was when I saw Lewis Black perform at the MGM Grand in Vegas.
My mom wanted to eat at the huge buffet at the MGM Grand that day, so while walking through the damn place I saw Lewis Black signs everywhere, saying that he'd be performing for a few nights - one of which was the date that I would be staying in Vegas. I asked if I could go, and miraculously, the woman said, "Okay." So after lunch, we went to the concierge desk and bought one ticket for $70, third row booth. No one else wanted to go with me (thank fucking goodness), so I'd have to walk back to the MGM from our hotel (the Monte Carlo) that night in time for the show.
I got to the Hollywood Theater deep inside the depths of the casino in the MGM early, and sat at my booth, which was supposed to sit five other people. The turned out to be the funniest goddamn people I had ever met in my life. I can't clearly remember all of their names, but I'll do my best: there were two couples in their 30's - Roy and Natalie, and Scott and Charlie. Scott's daughter, around my age, was there also. I can't remember her name worth a shit.
Roy had charmingly warned me first-off that every single one of them was totally drunk and wasted. Fuck this shit I'll finish this later.
Christina N. @ 5:15 PM
Tuesday, July 3
Now everybody has those days where even though they do the same shit that they do every day of which is usually not boring, until one day you are just completely fucking bored and lazy out of your mind. Today is one of those days for me. I woke up and went on the computer to fucking play Neopets games. I continued to do so for the rest of the day amidst washing dishes, eating, watching 15 minutes of TV and pretty much nothing else. It's kind of sad, really. Maybe there's another hormone jumble that my pituitary gland is fucking around with.
However, one useful thing that I did do today was watch Rob Zombie's The Devil's Rejects. Dude, that movie fucking kicked ass. I can't believe that I bought it about three months ago and never watched it until now. That was a time not very well spent. Don't know why I didn't buy or watch House of 1000 Corpses first, though. Fucking dumbass. Not that you would really need to watch the first of the two to know what's going on.
Yesterday me and a couple of diddly pals lit fireworks at a First Methodist Church parking lot. The occasion didn't last too long, considering I was feeling a lot like a wuss for not wanting to create an entire fucking psychedelic skyline because to be quite honest, I don't want to see or hear or get my fucking ass fronted by another fucking cop for at least a month. That anti-religious propaganda thing was worse than my public drinking stint.
Christina N. @ 8:38 PM
Monday, July 2
So I leave for California in three days. I'm not that overly excited - because, come on, how the fuck is spending a vacation with your sister, parents, and grandparents even remotely fantastic when you're a person who finds murder funny? Unless your family is the Manson family, I would think otherwise.
Here is your seldom dose of people who take themselves too seriously:
hahahahaha
ECHIDNAXCORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Echidna
NOSTRILXCORE is the epitome of badass
SpAcE gHoSt ArMbANds R00L
Echidna
Christina N. @ 4:17 PM
