Monday, September 10
Here is a list of people that need to die. With reasons given, of course!


1. Zac Efron
He is scheduled to star in the 2008/2009 re-make of the 1980s cult classic "dance-arific" film, Footloose. Footloose happens to be one of my most favorite, if not already, movie of all time. It was perfect in every way all to, and in, itself. Nobody, including people who hate this film, needs the Disney Channel's leftovers being mixed with easy listening '80s tunes. Don't do it; for the sake of human life itself. All we need to do is sacrifice one person. Just one. And maybe the director.

2. Britney Spears
Very typical answer. But, she is at an extreme low point in her life. And if she were to die right now, she wouldn't have had time to make a comeback - therefore she would not be remembered as an "Eternal Sleeping Beauty" or some other lame-ass bullshit like, "Deceased Pop Princess."

3. Burt Reynolds
Your career is over. Be done.

4. Steven Seagal
Nobody knows if he's even still alive anyway.

5. Danny Bonaduce
This man causes for a worldwide pukefest every time he comes on TV without a shirt on. His career was over thirty years ago. The VH1 show didn't do him any justice. No career, no good looks, no purpose, NO LIFE!

6. Star Jones
To stop her feeble attempts at taking over the world with her fish face. As if the earth didn't already have a bad enough reputation. Those microscopic organisms on Mars are doing shots for every time she signs another one of her books. /end corny joke

7. Jean-Claude Van Damme
Your time here has expired.

8. Fidel Castro
If America wants to kill a Cuban dictatorial leader so badly, they like to do it dramatically. That isn't going to happen with an old man wearing Depends that are made out of opium leaves infused with baby oil. They want to drop a nuke the size of John Goodman on a young, maniacal leader who can actually go to the bathroom by himself - Raul Castro. And that's not saying much.

9. Kanye West
He's just a fucking pain in the ass that never shuts up.

10. Barbara Walters
You suck. You have gotten too much facial reconstruction. You are senile old bitch. I don't care how many politicians you have fucked. You've been going through menopause for a really long goddamn time, considering you still qualify to remain on The View.


And there, my friends - are the ten people on this planet who have biblical targets engraved into their souls. They are damned for all eternity. The only way that they will be pardoned is to stop what they are doing and free us good Earthlings from bad taste..


Christina N. @ 10:24 PM