I don't know how I feel about the Red Hot Chili Peppers anymore. Their last couple of albums fucking sucked. "Tell Me Baby" better not be on the next fucking retail store CD because I just might as well stab myself with a green re-tagging gun while standing behind the register at Banana Republic. Anthony, Flea, Chad, John - please stop before you become the next Limp Bizkit.
Well not really (hopefully), but saying that they're on the way to being the next Metallica would be too cliche; and all too true.
Today included a long trip to Borders, and in the midst of my purchases was a Red Hot Chili Peppers "Best of" album from when Hillel Slovak was still alive and kickin'. It would be quite very good, had I heard this a year ago before I'd really heard Mr. Bungle. Dude, if you have seen and heard Mr. Bungle covering the Chili Peppers' songs out of mockery, you would think the same fucking way. I have to admit, Anthony Kiedis is a shitty singer - I can't really stand it right now, but I of course still have a liking toward the Red Hot Chili Peppers - just not as much as before. Mike Patton just fucking blows him away in terms of vocal talents making me laugh my ass off. I swear, fucking look it up on Youtube - Mr. Bungle covering the Red Hot Chili Peppers on Halloween, 1999. No wait, I'll do that job for you -
Mr. Bungle even had a random arabic guy hold up some sign about Chad Smith, just standing there in the background. They even had the right temporary tattoos to match. I have to laugh my tushie off every time.
What I mean is: When another band performs your own songs even better than you do - well then, you might as well shoot yourself. And that is how I feel about the Red Hot Chili Peppers.
So what did I buy at Borders? A lot of neat-o stuff. All for under 30 dollars.
1. The Stewardess is Flying the Plane! - American Films of the 1970s by Ron Hogan
2. On Bullshit by Harry G. Frankfurt, Professor of Philosophy Emeritus at Princeton University
3. Alarm magazine, which included a very [rightfully] arrogant Ipecac Recordings advertisement.
4. Wildlife CD by Mott the Hoople
5. Best of the Red Hot Chili Peppers CD by who the fuck do you think?
In one of Borders' many clearance sections, I also found a book on the history of electronic music. It talked about Isis, the X-ecutioners, Mouse on Mars, and probably a few others that are either under the Ipecac label or have something to do with it, but the record label itself was not mentioned in the book at all (nor was Mike Patton).
You want electronic? I'll show you electronic.
1. Alesis - AirSynth
2. Korg - Kaoss Pad 2
3. M-Audio - Ozone
4. LCD screen
5. ??
6. Boss - RV-5 Digital Reverb
7. custom made noise instrument
8. joystick
And then add these:
I heard those are dolls are where he hooks up microphones to, squeezes them or whatever and they make a noise. They also serve as high-quality most expensive of the most expensive stage ornaments. But to be honest, I'm not really quite sure what the fuck they're for.
It is a good time to shut up right now before I start writing a goddamn book that is loaded with bias.
Christina N. @ 5:43 PM
