I need to stop eating gum whenever I get nervous. It's a dumb fucking habit, man. Like whenever I'm at work and am in the presence of a few peers/co-workers/whateverthefuck and have nothing to say (as usual), sticking my hand in my pocket and pulling out to unwrap a piece of gum keeps me busy and gives me an excuse not to talk and stand through an awkward silence; which I have been through many.
I used to go through a pack a day. Partially because it was orange-flavored Orbit gum, which is just as addicting as crack-cocaine.
Work wasn't too bad on thy late Monday of August. My hot assistant manager Steve and I formed the Pier 1 Imports Minority Mafia and we hit whiteys. Fuck yeah. He's cuban and I'm asian, so he cuts with machetes and I pinch your cock with chopsticks. I don't know. Vietnamese people are lame. We don't even have our own form of martial arts, which is critical for my type of asian - black hair, yellow skin and mail slot eyes. Do we even have a cool torture method? Probably, because I would have heard about it by now. I mean, chinese people have the crazyass water torture, arabians tie each of a man's limbs to four different horses [for each limb] and make them run in opposite directions, and japanese people cut each other's pinkies off. What do I have? Nothing. Except the scent of raw nail polish.
Last night Sally took me to the diner and we played pool at the pool hall with her best friends Dawn and Dan. Her 12-year-old brother had to join all of us because he was bored at home. What a goddamn pain in the ass. I had a good time though, even if my billiard skills have downgraded much much more significantly since the last time I played; which was about a year ago. Jesus fucking Christ, I sucked. I can't believe I was even an expert back in the day. What the flying fuck, I suck at life.
Hey look, it's me!
We all look the same.
Christina N. @ 8:09 PM
