Wednesday, August 30
Motherfucker, my awesome friend Amy F. whom I haven't seen in fucking ages is coming over at 2:00 and my mom went to work early today, so she might come home while Amy is here. That means I have to go into pussy mode and not be myself, which would totally bore Amy. Totally lame, but those of you with totalitarian/fascist/Mussolini-for-those-who-don't-know parents know what I'm talking about. No cursing, no screaming, no drinking. No chocolate either with my mom, she says it makes me break out. Fuck that pathetic theory. I used to eat shitloads of chocolate at school, and it would do me no harm. But when I ate chocolate at home, I'd break out from the stress over my mom going all apeshit and whatnot. Jesus fucking Christ.

Nowadays, whenever I go out, my mom calls me and tells me, NO DRINKING!!! or else she'd cut my head off with her butcher knife. Come on, I'd love to have some brooskies, but with that kind of a circumstance, I can't drink without a head. Unless I'm like that headless chicken from way back when whose owner fed him corn kernels by stuffing them down his throat. Just place a funnel on my neck and keep on pouring down that vodka, bitch.

You know what annoys me? When people call you, ask you how you are for one second, and then proceed to talk about nothing but themselves and their supposedly amazing lives for 45 minutes, and not wanting any interruption whatsoever. Goddamn, I've got people doing that to me all the time and expecting me to listen and actually care. Well I do care up to some point, but I'm not your verbal diary here. Sometimes people talk so fucking much about themselves, I just sit there with the phone to my ear, periodically saying, "Uh huh" after every few sentences, while I'm watching TV or doing shit on the computer. And it wouldn't even matter, that's how much crap people keep wanting me to listen to. But I guess you have to sit there and listen to be a good buddy.

I guess I do that sometimes too, but it's because the other person isn't really giving me anything; as in feedback or anything about themselves to talk about, so I could bounce back on that. Like "dead conversations," as I like to call them.

I want to take this moment to comment on the complete suckage of U2. Hey Edge, did you know that your guitar can play more than five chords? Come fucking on. I can't even listen to the Ramones anymore because they bore me for pretty much the same reason - all of their songs sound the same. AC/DC is sort of like that, too. But no bands piss me off more when they come on the radio like The Beatles, U2, Jethro Tull, and Rush. Ulgh, talk about fucking suicide if you decide to stay on that same radio station. And Bono, did you know that you bump into things and trip and fall on your ass if you wear sunglasses in the dark? I'm sorry, I guess you're a big Corey Hart fan.

It's really sad that I don't know a single person who loves Tom Petty [and The Heartbreakers] as much as me. That man is so utterly amazing, I can't even say. No five-paragraph rant about him. Nope. He doesn't need it.

Been coughing up loogies all morning. Phlegm and mucous and shit, while coughing like a chain smoker. Ever since I got back from Kentucky, my throat has been a real damn motherfucker. And I really don't want my mom to find out because she'll blame it on my lifestyle or some habit that I have that isn't really relevant to the situtation, or something that has nothing to do at all with my throat.


Christina N. @ 10:40 PM