Tuesday, June 27
I only got home from work at about an hour ago and I'm already bored out of my fucking mind. It's that, or that I'm pissed off about being nauseous because, I don't know why. I'll tell you this, this weather fucking sucks. It's been like more humid around here than a fucking soiled pair of panties or some crap, and the people who live in this house with me are a bunch of pansies who can't stand the cold. Well is it my fault you chose to live here when you had the chance to move? No, I don't think so. I didn't even grow pubes at that time.

Work was pretty boring, too. My whole life is boring, man. Today at the Pier 1 of Imports, it wasn't as bad and fatal as it could have been, because Debbie was working. I am very distressed about her leaving soon (because of the shortage of hours and pay) to work at Dick's Sporting Goods. Hey, it's a good place for her because like her friend says, "They've got all shapes and sizes."

She fucking hysterically laughed her ass off when I told her something that Shaina told me about Coldstone Creamery - "It's like having an orgasm in your mouth." I'm serious, every person that that phrase is told to, laughs like they're going to die the next day. Is it that funny? I don't know, man. Well, I went to Maggie Moo's, which was further down the plaza from Pier 1 and got myself a cup of Better Batter Boogie Board - cake batter ice cream with brownies and rainbow sprinkles, motherfucker; it was deeee-lish. When I was done, Debbie says to me, "Now was that like an orgasm in your mouth?"

Later that day I started talking to her about the Oscar-winning porno film, Deep Throat, and how orgasming in your mouth was possible. You see, the chick in that movie, her G-spot was in her throat. So whenever she ate, she would orgasm. See? It's sort of possible.


Christina N. @ 4:43 PM