Wednesday, May 31
I've been the master of bad moods lately. Perhaps it's from being off of birth control and my hormones are back to being fucked up like before. I don't want to be on that shit again because it's the reason I gained weight. And I thought that I would never ever gain weight [over what I normally looked] in the past. The only good thing that birth control did was fix the monthly bloodshed to being regular, and got rid of an entire pizza of zits - all to leave me with some pork fat to get rid of. The typical and true thing left to say is, "I miss being a goddamn twig."

Since the weather is hot, sticky, and excruciatingly uncomfortable today, I drank a lot of fluids in school and had the most undesirable urge to take a nice long Niagara piss by the end of the day. Holy shit, it was so bad that I couldn't conduct my famous act as Speedwalking Champion of the World. With every step that I took while walking home was like dragging a fucking wet watermelon in the front of my fucking pants. That, along with the fear of some shithead neighbor stopping me to talk about the same nosy redundant bullshit when I crossed onto my street which further induced my bladder's intention to let go.

But, thank god nobody bothered me. You don't fucking bother Christina when she walks home. When I dash out of that goddamn school, I dash out of that goddamn school to get to my goddamn house. (And then to the refridgerator.) No fuckers cutting grass, no fuckers getting their kids into the van to go to the boring and dirty park, no fuckers stopping me to ask where I want to go and major in for college. I'm so serious, every single time a pathetic neighbor who lacks more of an entertaining life than I do stops me outside to talk, they always, always, always ask the same two questions: "Where do you want to go for college? What do you want to major in when you get there?"

And every goddamn time I answer something within the lines of, "I don't know." Exclude the rolling of eyes under sunglasses and thinking, "Shut the fuck up I consist of more than just school." These people know me long enough, as in since I was four years old, to know that I am the Anti-Fucktard. Alright? Jesus Christ, when I'm out on my own, I want to purchase a big fucking house in the woods with twenty-five acres of land like Ted Nugent so that I could shoot all the animals that I want, stuff them up on my walls like a grown up's version of Build-A-Bear, and have all of the big backyard thrash metal parties that I want with no dipshit next door neighbors filing lawsuits and police complaints at me.

Not that they haven't already filed complaints at me. Not at me specifically, but at our household - for noise. Noise? We were fucking having construction done to our house, of course there's going to be noise. There is no such thing as silent construction. Like Voltaire says, "Common sense is not so common." That is absolutely true when you live in the suburbs where ignorant people with no lives reside their dumb asses in.


Christina N. @ 4:30 PM