What the hell is with all these fucked up strawberries that I keep running into? My mother went to Shop Rite earlier today, and made me clean some strawberries to eat later on. And I just happen to be the one who cleans the batch of completely fucked up strawberries. They're the Perry Farrells of fruit. I'm serious. It is absolutely, proposterously, DISGUSTING.
Hey Guiness, why haven't you come to interview me yet? I'm obviously an attraction to fucked up fruit when I should really be an attraction to James Ihas.
These things just scare the living shit out of me, especially because I'm a picky eater. Yeah I know I'm a pig, but I eat the pretty food, man.
Stupid plant sperm wasn't potent enough for them to actually split into two and save me a heart attack?
What is this, quintuplet? There's no such thing as twins, much less quintuplets or any of that shit in the world of fruit, alright? Just like how we don't like babies with five heads.
EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!
And it's fucking orange.
For some reason this reminds me of a camel.
In comparison with normal strawberries.
See, ladies and gentlemen? This is what happens when you genetically fuck with America's produce. Thank god for organics. But the term "organic" wouldn't exist if we never fucked with our food in the first place.
Christina N. @ 8:47 PM
