Monday, January 23
I am looking at the layout, and realized that it does not match the content on this page. The way that I dress nowadays sort of accounts for the same thought also. Polka dot purses, ballet flats, lacey tops and cardigans? Come on Christina, you're coming off as a fucking pussy. I couldn't give less of a shit, because it doesn't fucking matter. I used to be cooler back in the day when I would wear my Nine Inch Nails shirt for every two fucking days or so. What a lie. That ain't cool anymore. I see freshmen wearing Slipknot and Hawthorne Heights shirts that are just as black with just as much lettering on them. I want to kick them in the face. Yeah, kick them in the face with my fucking ballet flat that has a flower on it. I bet I could still kick their teeth in all the way to their fucking liver with my ballet flat.

Anyway, Saturday night while extremely bored off of my ass, not being able to sleep, and was flipping through the channels, saw this half-hour special on Mastodon on MTV2. Holy shit, man, it was the first time I'd ever watched that channel in months for more than seven minutes. I was extremely impressed with Mastodon's live shows. Shit man, maybe there is a god.

And then right after those thirty minutes of bliss were over, the next channel, FUSE, had a half-hour-long thing with The Strokes performing. Man, I was going fucking nuts to actually see something that I am a huge fan of on TV. I know not many people like The Strokes, but I fucking do. I'd hit every single one of them, except for Fabrizio because he tapped Drew Barrymore. Drew Barrymore fucking sucks and she should've never been Cinderella or one of Charlie's Angels. She ruined both movies next to the ugly prince and Lucy Liu's ugliness too.

When you're as tired as I am at the moment, random shit flashes in front of your eyes and ideas just roll out like eggs out of a hen's ass. It's pretty awesome, except for the part where my mom gets angry at me for staying up late. I'm not a sleeper. Like I've said a thousand fucking times before, slumber for me is like watching a movie about hell for eight hours and not being able to get away from it. I can't remember the last time when I had a good dream. All of mine are much like snuff films and apocalyptic disaster films. Yeah man, it sucks balls. I hate sleeping. So if we were to do it, there would be no stopping at all. From night til day, man. From night til day.

Don't you hate that everything bagels have such a long fucking name? It's like that stupid fucking Green Day song, "Wake Me Up When September Ends." Title that is too fucking long. Why can't they just name everything bagels something like, "loaded bagels?" Hell yeah, that is a great fucking name for a bagel. They're loaded. Full of seeds. Full of cream cheese. Full of goodness.

The term "everything bagel" is also a lame excuse for not being able to make up a proper name for it. I say "loaded bagel" is the best term, man. Just watch, some internet spokeswhore will be reading this and before you know it, everything bagels will be the new diet trend and its new term "loaded bagel" will be featured in next week's episode of Best Week Ever.

I have to sign up for my six hours soon. All out of my pocket too, fucker. I just have this horrible feeling that I'm either going to kill 26 people out on the road within my first two hours of driving, or I'm going to maim myself so badly that I wouldn't be able to take a shit by myself anymore for the rest of my life. No wonder my parents wouldn't let me keep the dartboard in my room, they know I'd kill four times as many people with a car. I always talk about how I want to run over animals and dipshits who think Kurt Cobain is a god that created the universe, and it would most likely flow over to just regular pedestrians/any sad loser who happens to be in my way.


Christina N. @ 11:38 PM