Yeah so Elena is currently annoying the fuck out of me and trying to get my rock-hard wall of a good mood right now with all this immature bullshit on how she thinks the pope was pure bullshit and Terry Shiavo and calling babies, yes infants, dumbasses or something.
I really don't like red blood cells in the face. I really can't tell if I'm coming up with a fever, whether I'm irritated at Elena, or if I'm thinking about that dude too much. Elena really caught me at a bad time to argue and discuss current/world issues and whateverthefuck non-emo teenagers talk about.
Yesterday at lunch he came over to me, Lauren, Eric, and Jen to "supposedly" ask for geometry homework, and then towards the end of the conversation Lauren blurts out how my face was beet red. Right in front of him. And everybody else around us. Fucking embarassing, seriously. I think I shouldn't hang around people at A lunch anymore. So he could approach me when I'm not intimidated not only by his extreme sex appeal but by all my friends sitting around my like kindergarteners sitting around their teacher at story time. But if I abandon my friends like that, I am officially full of shit. More than I already am.
Holy god, he watches me come into school and even when I walk around the school outside to my chemistry class. How adorable is that? It's so fucking obvious. The second I walk through that door first thing in the morning he's always sitting by the door and turning his head when I come by. My goodness, no wonder I turn red like Axl on a cameraman rampage when he talks to me.
I think it was yesterday, or some day before that, when he even nondirectly admitted to his vigil of me. He asked if I cut first block because he saw me at an odd side of the building walking around like an ass. I said no, I was just going to class. But, holy shit, you can't imagine how flattered I am that someone actually pays attention to where I go. I wonder if he watches me do anything else, besides come to school and go to chemistry class.
Yeah, I think he waits for me to come out of gym class so he could at least say something before his lunch is over and he has to go back to his class. Like that last time in January or February or something when he said that I was always really hot, that one time outside. When I went outside with a t-shirt, ripped jeans and an ice cream bar in thirty-degree weather.
I'm just babbling on and on, this entry has no structure at all. So maybe just thinking about this person is making me all hot and red and shit, and I'm not coming up with a fever or anything. Blind love is what causes one to do dumb things, such as writing dumb entries that they are surely going to regret in the future.
I felt so bad yesterday, because we got to finally pick our own seats for the last quarter in geometry, and he kept looking over like he really wanted to sit with me, but Katrina asked first so I now sit with her in the way back corner of the classroom, nowhere really close to him at all. Well, he sits two seats in front of me, which is still practically impossible to interact when everyone's sitting at computers. What makes it even more uncomfortable is that Katrina is his ex.
It's less than twelve hours until the next time I see him, but it feels like eternity because I still have to shower (which takes as long for Karl Marx to get an erection) and go to bed. Sleeping is pretty hard for me sometimes, and sometimes I can't sleep until after two hours of just lying in my bed thinking about dumb shit. Like, How many strips of bacon could be made from one of Axl Rose's love handles alone? Or how far is the distance between my affection [for anything], and Gwar?
For some reason probably my most favorite part of the day, besides talking to him, is in the morning when I get ready for school. It's just so fucking peaceful, now that it's spring and the sun shines through the window so nicely, bringing such warmth and hope to my room. But then the fucking sibling wakes up and with an extremely loud click coming all the way from her room even behind closed doors, turns on her stupid fucking television to such utter cowshit such as MTV and FUSE, who plays nothing but asswipe mildue like J. Lo and Ludacris just two seconds after my peace and quiet of sunshine and white transparent curtains. She fucking ruins it.
But other than that, I fucking love the morning. I get washed up, get dressed in some skanky shirt and circulation-cutting jeans, comb the hair nice and pretty, spray the perfume, get my ass into the car, talk for a minute or two while my mom drives me to school (I'm too much of a lazy fuck to walk anymore) , only to brighten a certain someone else's day too by walking through that door. It's stunning.
Now to ruin your fucking mood right now I'll post what Elena wrote that so aggravated me before, in
her Livejournal:
NAH NO LJ CUT NOPE SRYS IF THIS HURTS YOUR FEELINGS YOU GOD DAMN BABIES
does anyone want to tell me how so many insane people are left unsuspiciously running around while someone as normal as me is seen as something to be viewed with caution? by this i mean, what the fuck is wrong with everyone about the pope? first off, this guy wasnt that great, he was behind many pedophile cases, no pun intended. when i saw sinead o'conner rip his picture up i instantly fell for her. fight the real enemy! he has been defeated! i know i should be respectful and shit that someone died, but no fuck you all, by that i mean, fuck all the catholics and others flocking to this overly morbidly hysterical parade going on just so they can feel as if they've done something good and have a spot in heaven. what the fuck is wrong with everyone!?! theres this dead guys body being paraded around on some magic carpet being held up by other priests that make michael jackson look like hes actually heterosexual and a bunch of people watching this crying and fainting all over the place. this must be the creepiest and most intriguing thing i have ever seen in my whole life! quite exciting! hilarious! his body has been embalmed and his heart has been buried god knows where. his rotting body is just being paraded around, some dead guys corpse is lying there while millions of people are flocking to see him, WELL ITS A BIT TOO LATE NOW! jeez what the fuck is wrong with you people? WHY would you seriously want to see someones dead body like that? and i was the one being called a necrophiliac this whole time! you all fucking sicken me, sure you might think i'm the sick one because for years ive been making so many disturbing necrophiliac and dead baby jokes about everything but none of you do anything to actually help others or even care to. all you have to do to get your little safe spot in heaven is go stand with a bunch of dumbasses waiting for a dead corpse to pass by while wearing some $1 charity bracelete made in china, oh fuck you!I highly disagree with a lot of it and basically 90% of it is immature, shallow, angst. Something is seriously going on in that head of hers, and it's hormones and menstrual blood.
