Tuesday, February 15
Why is Bright Eyes suddenly "the band" to like? I'd diss the living shit out of them if I hated their music. Luckily, for Conor Oberst and his listeners, I've never heard a single song. Did I say how much I hate people who go to Morris Knolls? Yeah, they're up in the Gwar and Dashboard Confessional and Michael Bolton league.

Today was peachy. In gym class we learned how to put harnesses on. It felt like a nasty boner was up my cha cha for a straight hour. Almost persuaded me to not have sex. A good method for teaching abstinence to teenagers will be to make your students put on rockclimbing harnesses for an hour or two. Then make them squat up and down for another good half hour, Richard Simmons style. They'd be running home tightening their belts and sticking their thongs back down their butt cheeks.

One guy was real skinny, I don't see the difference between his package and all the other skinny guys, but the girls kept making fun of him and how he should stay away while they were putting theirs on. He wasn't really hot anyway. There are no hot guys in my gym class sadly. But in eigth grade, my teacher was a pretty cute twenty-something year old guy and when he put a harness on and went climbing, oh boy, I thought a toucan was trying to escape out of his trousers (with a mango in its beak). I even pretended that I had trouble putting mine on, just so that he could help me. Oh Christina, you and your horniness.

Last night I watched the episode of South Park where Cartman tried to find his dad. The greatest indian name has got to be, They Who Cannot Keep Their Legs Closed [regarding to Cartman's mom].

Someone launched a stinkbomb after lunch yesterday. For a second I thought my dad came to visit for some insane, probably gas-induced reason.


Christina N. @ 5:44 PM