One's hair gets this big after washing it for the first time in three days. Webcams are dumb, so not only do I look like a cross between a heroin addict and and the wicked witch of the west, I barely have any eyes. Like someone drilled them out with a Bob Vila advertised yellow powerdrill purchased in a holiday gift set along with twenty different sized drill bits for $40 from Sears. No, I don't like to bathe thoroughly on weekends, because I never go anywhere at all, nor do I go close enough to anyone to whiff up my dead skin cells who lives in this house along with me. Now that's what I call good reason to save on the water bill. But if I got a hot date or whatnot, beware, for I will take up to an hour in the porcelain tiled domain.
In reality I am really ugly, that is why pictures are not taken directly in front of the figure and always in an angle with a bunch of hair follicles covering more than half the damn thing. And why is it dark? That, my dears, I don't know.
And what was the point of all this? To fill up space, that's what it is. Someday I hope to set the record for longest journal entry in history, but my life is as exciting as your old grandmother comatose for thirty years from chain smoking lung cancer wearing a Dave Matthews t-shirt. I believe I have already set the record for most pointless journal entry, multiple times.
I have the interview of Axl Rose in 1990 where he talks about Izzy being punched by Vince Neil. He says that Vince hit Izzy "like a powderpuff." For some reason every time I think about that I laugh my ass off. Well not really laugh my ass off, but it amuses me very much.
Nobody likes Interpol. That's a real goddamn shame. When I ask someone if they like Interpol, they're like, "What?" Come on, the only time you ask "What?" about music is if someone had just said that Gwar was amazingly talented. Then you kick the person in the balls. If it's a girl then kick her in the crotch anyway. It still hurts.
So my mom says we're not doing anything for Thanksgiving weekend. Being that the house is not done in the remodelling process and well we don't have change to go out and do shit. Neither do I have friends. The depressing thing here is not the fact that we don't have money to go anywhere, it's the fact that no one wants to go out and do something with me. And if you do, well then I love you very much. The only good thing that's probably going to happen is that she's going to make her famous pasta. That shit is damn tasty. That's right you read it, a vietnamese woman who makes delicious italian food.
I really don't get italians. How the fuck do they make such good food? Wolfgang Puck, I'd bow down to you right now if I could. Well of course I could just get a picture of you, frame it, put it on a little table in my room surrounded by candles and worship you chanting pornographic hymns, but sadly enough I already do that to Jimmy Page. Or at least I think Wolfgang Puck is italian. If he isn't, then I would do that to the grandma in Everybody Loves Raymond.
It is extremely rare for me to like more than two songs from a female artist. And the only artist so far to fill that spot is Sheryl Crow, to be honest. At first I really fucking hated her, I don't know why, but listening to her self-titled, it's pretty damn good after all. Call me a pussy, but I don't care. At least I'll relate to Axl in a way. Who gives a fuck if it's negative.
Christina N. @ 8:03 PM
