Wednesday, November 24
Valhallaskye. Every time I read her username, I think of that Tom Cruise movie, Vanilla Sky. Then I start to get hungry for a tub of french vanilla frosting, which I love to eat with a butter knife. Because spoons suck and some frosting still gets stuck on it. Unlike the nice smooth baby butt surface of a butter knife. No rough edges either, so I won't look like a fucking dumb cunt who doesn't know how to commit suicide correctly. Also known as emo kids.

I'm sad to say that I don't know her well enough, but she has commented on one of my earlier posts saying that she feels old and mature and that I am quite the contrary. I'm as mature as that little boy across your street that waits at his window every day waiting for you to walk into your bathrooom, strip down to your sleepwear and take a shower. Then eventually he brings all of his other little friends over and go like, "Hey, check out this chick across my street with these big honkers!" But, I don't have big honkers and hopefully I don't have little boys who don't know how to masturbate living across the street from me. And if they did know how to jack off, I bet their sperm would have "Christina" written all over them little buggers, if they ever jacked off to me in the shower. And hopefully Molly doesn't have little Ben Stillers living across the street from her either.

But even if those little boys didn't know how to jack off, I bet the sperm inside their nuts would be chanting my name over and over and over and waving those little tails more rapidly than dogs humping Paris Hilton's leg.

So she's a recent college graduate. I congratulate her. Very much, for making this far in life. Past all of her fellow peers' bullshit. But excuse me, I shouldn't be talking, for they may be totally different from mine. Which I highly doubt because this world is 95% Gwar fans and only a mere puny 5% Gwar haters. Or at least I hope those Gwar haters really hate Gwar, then I might have to change it to 96%, because they're fucking liars.


Christina N. @ 9:41 PM