Tuesday, August 24
No, that is not true.

Two nights ago I drank sour milk that was in the fridge, and ever since I've been feeling like crap. Lesson I learned from this: Always throw up after drinking sour milk, for if you don't it will bring you many a days of pain and suffering. And never buy milk from Chinese supermarkets. For god's sake they even sell moldy bread. Just go and look at the bags of sandwiches. A turquoise dot here, a fuzzy turquoise dot there. Polka dotted bread. Looks pretty, ain'it? Well it doesn't taste good.

Haha, I remember I almost ate a moldy donut. The box had been lying on my aunt's tv shelf for quite a while and it looked appetizing.

The scene today after getting home from Jeannie's, in the kitchen while the mother was grilling beef.

Mom: What do you want?
Moi: It smells good.
Sibling: What smells good?
Mom: My meat!

She should watch what she says, cuz then I'd look insane laughing at an unapparent joke that they didn't get.

We had the most fascinating conversation during dinner eating the cow's meat. Remembering what had happened at Jeannie's when we found a carton of eggs on the kitchen table and I picked one up asking why there were brown eggs and there were white eggs, and after her answer of not knowing, for some goddamn reason I spazzed out and dropped it, letting the poor thing fall to its misery of a little cracked crater dent on the side. I could just see it crying inside, tears running down its smooth exterior of calcium and the same material that seashells are made from, having no hands to get a hanky and wipe them away.

Thank goodness it didn't break and set its yellow and clear splooge onto my navy blue shirt, or my just-washed hair which took forever to suds up and rinse. You have no idea how much I'd love to take a 5 minute shower.

Anyway, if it was anyone who knew about things that came outta their asses it would be my mom. She told me that only brown chickens laid brown eggs and the reason that brown eggs were so expensive was that they were more rare than black or white chickens. I wonder if it's true, cuz she learned all this from a run down school in Vietnam with shit-covered walls and teachers that beat you with rulers.

David Carradine makes the coolest sandwiches. Seriously, in Kill Bill Vol. 2 you should've seen the way he cut those crusts and spread that Hellman's mayo. Man, compared to his, mine literally look like shit that was once a taco and chicken quesadilla from Taco Bell. You should've seen him tackle those pieces of turkey and that knife the size of Jason's with the ease of Ron Jeremy with a brand new 13 year old virgin still wearing her first training bra.

I finally saw the new Velvet Revolver video. Overall, I enjoyed it, but it had this sort of sense of emo corniness in it. Which is a minus. But, there was lots of half naked and drugged up Scott and some softcore porn here and there, it was good. He has the same Ramones shirt as I do! Except that mine's red. Duff, always hot. Matt couldn't have looked any better, love the aviator sunglasses. And Dave Kushner? I always forget about him, along with many other people. Poor guy. And Slash? Well we don't need to say anymore about him. My real opinion on it is that I don't really have one. It was blah. It had its pluses and minuses. Whatever. I'll watch it for the good views. I never really had much respect for that song either, and the press and their shitful reviews just would never shut up about it. It kept reminding me of Staind (EW) and "Superhuman" would've been a better single. I like "Loving the Alien" better as one of the slower songs on their album anyway. But what do I know, I don't know shit about anything.

You faggots got lucky yesterday, I didn't post.


Christina N. @ 8:23 PM