Friday, July 16
How the fuck do chickens stay alive even after getting their heads cut off? It's been baffling me for years and I still have no goddamn legitimate answer. Aw man, I'd like to do that to ex dead president Robert Taft and see him run around like a giant jiggly hairy jello mould with blood spurting out of the neck.

I wanna get Where the West Was Won. But I have no money.

I also want to see Pulp Fiction again. And laugh at the awkward dance scene. And when Vince shoots Marvin in the face by accident.

I don't want to read this book anymore. It's too fucking boring. The only nonfictions I like are rock autobiographies. This is a rock biography. Hence nothing funny. The only thing worth looking at long enough are the pictures of Jim Morrison.

I wish I could pull off wearing aviator sunglasses. That would be so awesome.

By the way, I need more Led Zeppelin t-shirts.

Is silly puddy a liquid, or a solid? Same thing with peanut butter. Or maybe it's something in between, called a siquid. Sounds like some disoriented drunk-on-Jack-Daniels squid to me.

Wow, that was so shitful.

This is one of the most kick ass instrumental songs I have ever heard. Bonzo's drums almost practically beat out Jimmy's acoustic completely.

The bitch slut neighbor's dog across the street won't keep it's fucking mouse trap fucking shut. It barks all afternoon, all morning, all times when I'm in the bathroom, because that room is directly across from the dog's fucking whorehouse. I'd like to walk over there with a butcher knife, sever its head off with a crunch of the spine, skin its now brown shit-stained fur off, butcher it into pieces for cooking, make teriyaki with sauce, and give it as a gift to the 3 cent slut that owns it.

Then she'll be like, "Where's my dog?". And I'll be like, "About to be in your toilet."

That was just too graphically enjoyable, but this is what happens when you're locked up in the house for months at a time.


Christina N. @ 9:29 PM